betrayed? …again?
Unlock the Proven Method to Fully Recover, Regain Your Innocence, and Thrive Living Your Best Life
Five Stars
“I genuinely feel more confident knowing I can avoid duplicity and deceit way easier than before.” —Tim B, Sarasota, FL
“Your method works.
“I made more progress in one 90-minute session than in 20 years of working with my psychologist. I’ve barely begun to dip into this work and already it has made me aware of so much more happening around me. Before I didn’t know why I kept being susceptible to the same cons.
”Now I can see them coming, make choices I didn’t recognize existed before, and take action to avoid riding out another catastrophe.” —Sarah K, Seattle, WA
WARNING! This Offer Could Be Taken Down At Any Time…
It’s a complete myth that you have to be hyper-vigilant 24x7 to avoid scammers, grifters and con artists.
Ever wonder why some people seem to sniff out a rotten deal ahead of time?
In today’s offer, you’re going to learn the insider “secrets” that unlock your unique personal potential and allow you to integrate your own inner knowing, see through the illusions, and make real changes in your life.
You can do this without overextending trust to strangers, without investing too much time or money, and without relying on other people’s promises.
You’ll also discover…
4 Simple Steps to relieve shame about repeated failures and strengthen your resilience vs proposals made in bad faith
Scenario #1:
You turn inward, swear “never again!” and retreat into protectionism; cut off form others, and/or overly blame self. May include a depressive spiral, withdrawal from engagement, or refusal to interact. Stoic or “strong silent types” may functionally withdraw while retaining some presence. Does not prevent future betrayals from happening, in which the cycle repeats.
Find Hidden Roots of repeated incidents of betrayals, especially if they’re in the same area of life: relationships, money, career, or anything else
Protect Yourself From Propaganda and other messages shaped with an intent to influence
Right here on this page, I’m about to reveal to you the most common mistake that causes people to be taken advantage of — but most people (maybe you) have NO CLUE that they’re doing it.
You see,
EVERY TIME YOU FEEL BETRAYED, ONE OF THESE SCENARIOS PLAYS OUT:
in every case, having a core expectation unexpectedly and violently unmet occurs
Scenario #2:
You lash out, cause drama, blame others. While you drive away the betrayer, you also cause excessive collateral damage to everyone around you, resulting in reduced access to or being cut off f entirely from required resources. May include momentary euphoria and/or moments of self-righteous victory or outrage justifying aggressive behavior. While this one instance passes, yet another one crops up, even as soon as the memory starts to fade.
Scenario #3:
You refocus, reinforce your boundaries, and take appropriate action to prevent repeat occurrences. Focused, clear boundaries are (re)established and appropriate consequences are negotiated, or the relationship is ended. Collateral damage is kept to a minimum and mitigated. You maintain your sense of self respect
If you’re not consistently getting to result #3, you have some work to do.
WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN *THAT THIRD SCENARIO* AND THE FIRST TWO?
It’s NOT divine intervention, a good upbringing, or a fat bank account … and DEFINITELY not luck.
Even therapists sometimes offer things like “time heals all wounds” — which is NOT how it works. (we can’t blame them though, academia is built on thinking, and as is so often the case, solutions to emotional problems are emotional in nature, so a thinking approach is unlikely to be effective.)
The truth is, there’s ONE THING that makes all the difference in emotional processing:
Your EMOTIONAL SKILLS.
And if you’re not experiencing scenario 3 REGULARLY, then you’re not harnessing the best your own emotions have to offer.
So with that said…
HERE’S HOW TO HEAL PROPERLY
(And What’s KILLING Your Recovery After Betrayal)
Think of the last time you were in flow. ‘In the zone,’ ‘lost in the sauce.’
What do you notice?
Perhaps your systems were all in balance, humming along without an emergency in sight.
Your focus sharp as you notice your working context; your decisions swift and having meaningful impact on your outcome.
Maybe you were progressing towards a goal; maybe you were discovering how something (or someone) worked.
There’s a contentment of process; you may have unsolved problems in front of you, yet your state of being is very much alive and you are able to quickly adapt as your situation develops.
THAT’S EXACTLY HOW YOUR SYSTEM IS SUPPOSED TO FUNCTION…
Flow state allows our conscious and subconscious minds to work together in the moment to make leaps in understanding and effectiveness.
Children do this naturally…
…until something comes along that interrupts flow and activates a more important-urgent response: something that threatens or causes pain to occur.
…UNTIL SOMETHING CAUSES PAIN.
Pain is our body’s way of loudly announcing:
“I don’t understand this.”
”I’m not equipped for this.”
”This could be (and probably is)
dangerous.”
”Maybe even life threatening.”
Pain is a natural interrupt mechanism designed to shift our focus when something important is happening that we don’t understand. This can include
physically — impacting something hard, falling; getting punched
biologically — sick
chemically — acid burns, environmental pollutants
thermally — too hot or too cold
emotionally — betrayal, trauma
Pain makes you pay attention.
The skill, quality and effectiveness of that attention directly determines outcome and impacts future encounters that pattern match the same situation.
In the case of burning your hand on a hot thing (like fire), a reflex reaction — which bypasses your thinking brain, because it’s notoriously slow — is to pull your hand back.
Your biology doesn’t understand how to handle that much heat, so it generates an immediate response. While there will still be some damage that requires healing over time, your quick response prevents more damage, a worse burn, from happening.
Yow!
Your body then proceeds to do the best it can to repair the damage and heal the wound, assisted by whatever medical technology we have access to (running cold water over it, salve, ointment, etc).
It seems very straightforward for an example like burning your hand; we collectively understand reflexes like that pretty well.
Emotions are less directly obvious because emotions interface much more directly with our conscious mind, including consciousness in the mitigation process. Societally, we don’t collectively have comparable aftercare mechanisms in place.
Your Subconscious Flags Circumstances where Pain Happened,
Actively Seeks Out Repetitions,
and Automatically Serves Back The Same Feelings
When a Contextual Match is Found
Our subconscious is a marvelous tool in how it works and what it does for us.
It is tuned first for survival. If a set of emotional responses produced survival before, it must work again, right?
Logic isn’t our subconscious’ forte, nor should it be. Logic is a slow, expensive process left to the conscious mind which is much more suited to it.
Our subconscious emphasizes fast, broad processing of a tremendous amount of data. It compares current contexts to its internal database of events + emotions.
Your subconscious will seek and find an event match, then serve up the same emotions that got us through the last time.
It seeks these events proactively because the rustle in the bush could be nothing, or it could be a tiger that’s scoping you out for lunch. Being wrong in the first instance costs very little; being wrong in the second means you’re done.
This worked very well in simple environmental contexts. In today’s complex social interactive layers, it directly fuels trauma cycles. On the upside, a repeating trauma cycle can be fixed. Being eaten is rather permanent.
Let’s Talk About Emotions For a Moment
Emotions are how our body talks to itself. It is a remarkably efficient way of focusing bodily resources quickly to change stances to respond and keep up with external contexts.
Obvious example: it’s 10,000 years ago, and you see a rustle in the bushes. Your Adrenalin surges, your muscles tense, fight or flight engages: this process of activating resources to be ready for action is what the fear family is all about. In this example, it allowed your ancestors to not become a predator’s lunch.
Every emotion carries a message and precisely the amount of energy to deal with that message. Most of the time, it generates the outcome it was designed for: survival.
Putting It All Together
So you have an incredibly efficient pattern-matching system coupled with a remarkably responsive focus orientation system working together to recreate the same outcomes under the same circumstances actively seeking repeat.
Sometimes the circumstances might not be an exact match, but you’ll still create the same negative outcomes anyway.
If you don’t do something different, you’re going to keep repeating the same patterns over and over and over and over again.
While your at it, your kids will learn from you and either approach things the same way, or take the polar opposite approach. Didn’t you do one of those two things with your parents?
Repeated patterns don’t have to be a life sentence. You may have heard:
THE ONLY WAY OUT IS THROUGH
and yes, this is the case. There are several things that must happen in order for the pattern to dissolve:
revisit the original event
encounter emotions present
receive messages from your own emotions
harness emotional energy to process those emotions to do useful work
update the event database with new information gained from new perspectives, experience, or interpretation of circumstances
reintegrate the new interpretation
The next time those circumstances arise, you will have new choices arise in real time that produce different results.
I’m in. What’s Next?
Optional: Consultation
You and I spend up to an hour answering your questions, determining if we’re a good match to work together, going over administrative or logistical details, etc.
1st Session
While most sessions run just under an hour, the first one tends to go long, typically an hour and a half. This gives us some extra time going over basic frameworks and help set you up for success with these methods. Otherwise very similar to Ongoing Session Work.
Ongoing Session Work
Typically just under an hour, we cover these things:
open with your desired outcome for the session and hone it with specificity, clarity, and alignment with your own heart.
Then we look at obstacles and seek the roots to those obstacles.
We’ll talk a bit about what emotions come up and how we’re going to harness those emotions.
Move forward with experiential techniques to address those root causes that integrate specific relevancies to your situation.
After the session, I recommend taking 3-5 hours to rest. Drink some water, take a bath, allow some time for integration. This helps your system absorb and integrate what just happened in the session.
Packages
Some challenges are going to require more than one session to fully resolve. A package is a group of sessions targeted toward a specific outcome at regular intervals over time. As these are currently under development, it’s best to ask me about them during a consultation; it’s likely we can design a custom package to fit your circumstances.
YOU’LL KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU REQUIRE TO SHIFT YOUR BETRAYAL PATTERNS INTO THRIVING NEW LIFE
Now — most people have no idea how to do this. So if you’re not sure where to begin to mine the riches that lie buried beneath your pain, it’s not your fault.
Studies have shown that people aren’t wired to understand how their pain contains the seeds of their own freedom. And for those who do, they often can’t explain how they got there — one day, things that were once painful, no longer interrupt their life with urgency.